i dont have a name so sue me
by Jellyfisher2
Summary: Suddenly thrust into the middle of a four-way gang war, Sasori has to not only take down the three other gangs but also build the Akatsuki into the city controlling giant it was meant to be.
1. From Nobody

**Ahh, new story! I'm not going to say much here as to not clog the space up. I'm just going to use this space for general warnings in the chapter, so if you don't want spoilers I'd suggest skipping this. ****Like I say in every story this is posted on my ao3 and tumblr as well.**

**~Warnings~**  
><strong>just gun violence and cursing for this one<strong>

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><p>Crisp, November air nipped at the exposed skin of their face, making them wish that there was a way of wearing a ski mask without looking like a murderer or thief. This cold season was really kicking their ass. Being from a desert where the day temperature never dropped below 70°F didn't leave them prepared to deal with negative temperatures.<p>

They trudged down cracked sidewalk. Their only thought was a simple _'I really want to go home.' _It hadn't been a good day and they just wanted to sleep it off. Plus, they had a meeting with a very important art dealer the next day. Sleep was in their best interest.

"Tch, look at this fuckin' trash." Sasori looked up, expecting the comment to be directed at them. It wasn't. A group of four individuals wearing spiked, leather jackets were staring at a wall with spray paint plastered on it. They were obviously from the Salamander gang, one of several in the city. Sasori, unfortunately, lived in the direct center of three different gang territories. There was a shootout at least once a week. They desperately wanted to move away, but with the lack of money and their art career pretty much dead, they were forced to listen to gun fire at all hours.

"The Samurai think they're hot shit." A different member said, disdain for the rival gang very clear. Sasori kept their head down, hoping to get away quietly. The last thing they needed was trouble with some gang. "I mean, who even let them put their trash on our street?"

"The fuck you'd say?" A new person said. They lead a group of four people, all of them dressed in shiny red shirts with black kanji sewn on and swords strapped to their backs. _'God damnit, the Samurai are here.' _Sasori thought. They needed to get out of there. _'Just a few more feet and I can get away.'_

"I said, why the _fuck_ is your trash on _our_ street." The Salamander stepped forward threating. Sasori slowly came to a stop. They needed to consider what would be the safest way to get out of the situation, turn around or just keep going past the gangsters.

"This ain't your street anymore, _bitch." _The Samurai member stepped up to meet the other's challenge. _'Someone's going to get shot, I can feel it.' _Sasori thought as they hid behind a telephone pole. Part of them wanted to see how this situation would play out.

"Fuck you, we had to fight the Akatsuki tooth and nail for this damn street. We ain't gonna give it up to some punk asshole wannabes." The Salamander reached inside their jacket for what was probably a gun.

The Samurai member laughed. "Congratulations, you took a street from a "gang" that can barely hold down a damn church nobody else wants. You gonna brag about killin' a housefly, too?"

In the blink of an eye, the smug Samurai was staring down the barrel of a pistol. Sasori saw the smugness leave their eyes, but their face never wavered. The sight of the gun didn't scare Sasori at all like it should've, the result of their fucked up childhood.

The other members half-heartily tried to calm the Salamander member down but tensions were through the roof. Nothing short of a miracle was going to stop this. In a split second everyone had their guns out and was ready to fire. There was a pause. Nobody wanted to make the first move.

Sasori crouched in an effort to make themselves a smaller target. If they were going to stay to watch they at least needed to not get shot by a stray bullet. They heard a gun cock. Then, hell broke loose. Bullets flew through the air, pinging off metal and brick, leaving harsh indents wherever they hit. The gangsters dropped like flies until only one person, a Samurai member, remained.

Sasori stood up and tried to leave as quickly as humanly possible. Only, a SMG pointed in between their eyes stopped them. "Wrong place, wrong time, motherfucker." The Samurai had a sadistic smile.

_'Oh. Oh no.'_

A gun fired, but it wasn't the one at their head. The Samurai crumbled at their feet. Sasori looked up from the body to whoever saved them. The first thing they noticed was the person's orange hair, then their brown eyes that carried an intensity that unsettled Sasori more than the shotgun in their hands did.

"You alright?" They asked, their gun already hidden.

"I'm fine." Sasori replied in their normal monotone. They had seen much worse before. A bullet shot sideways though some random person was nothing new.

They glanced over Sasori's front. "What gang are you in? I don't know any that wear purple."

"I'm not in a gang." Sasori snapped. They straightened their jacket and smeared the blood on their face in an attempt to wipe it off.

"Seriously? You just witnessed what I would call a pretty intense shootout, had a gun to your head, and I didn't see you even break a sweat." They stopped. "You've been in one before though, right?"

Sasori hesitated. "Yes, but that was a long time ago."

"Huh. Oh uh, I'm Yahiko of the 6th Street Akatsuki." Yahiko held out a hand for Sasori to shake. They did so reluctantly. "I use him/he pronouns." Sasori gave a short nod. "How about you?"

"Them/their and…Hiruko's my name."

"I don't believe that name for a second, but the cops are gonna show up like _now_, so we need we to go." Yahiko jogged off. Sasori followed, only because it was the opposite direction of all the bodies.

"You know," Yahiko said without breaking his jog. "You should join the Akatsuki. We could really use someone like you."

"Someone like what?"

"You know. Someone calm who was past experience. That'll be really helpful. And well, we just need people in general. We're not a big gang."

"No thanks. I don't feel like making running from the cops and getting shot at a regular occurrence."

"Well, if you change your mind, I'll be at the church on 6th Street. You'll know it when you see it."

Sasori, true to their reserved nature, didn't say anything more. A block later, Yahiko had to leave. "I'm completely serious about you joining. You won't regret it. Most of the time anyway."

"If I tell you I'll think about it, will you leave me alone?" Yahiko nodded. "Fine, then I will." He smiled and jogged away. Sasori walked the rest of the way to their apartment.

Their bag hit the couch not a second before they landed next to it. Their eyes already glued to their pathetic excuse of a television. Static crackled until, "- Channel 8 News here with a breaking story. This afternoon, a gang gun down occurred on the intersection of Kusagakure and Getsugakure . It appears to be between the gangs Samurai and Salamander, but police suspect others may be involved. More as the story develops. "They changed channels.

'_Why the hell would I want to get involved in that?' _Sasori asked themselves. _'I don't need that life anymore. I have art now. I can believe in my art, I can _trust_ my art. It hasn't lead me wrong yet.'_

They rolled onto their stomach. _'I should sleep. I do have that meeting tomorrow morning.' _They reached into their pocket for their phone so that they set an alarm. They couldn't find it. _'The hell?' _In a blind panic, they tore apart their messenger bag, and when that wielded no results, their studio apartment. When they checked their pants pocket for the 18th time it hit them.

'_That son of a bitch stole my phone.'_

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><p><strong>I'm really excited for this story! I've been in love with saints row recently and I just had to do this. Let's hope that I don't lose interest or get violently burnt out on it. And if you're worried that you need to know about saints row to read this, don't be.<strong>

**Anyway, thank you for reading! Expect more eventually! **


	2. Damaged Property

**Warnings: violence and cursing**

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><p>'<em>I hope that son of a bitch has a death wish.'<em> Sasori though, absolutely fuming with anger. Because Yahiko stole their phone, they didn't know their art meeting had been canceled. They looked like a fool showing up with a puppet on their back. If they didn't desperately need a contract, they wouldn't even think about going back. _'I don't care if it's in a fucking church, I'm gonna kill him.'_

They surveyed the building in front of them. In only the vaguest sense of the word could it be called a church. It had the shape of a 19th century cathedral, and there was a small graveyard beside it but that was it. The walls were in such a state of decay that it was hard to read the graffiti plastered on them. The ground looked as if life had never even thought about touching it, and Sasori was positive the dark stains on the concrete were blood. _'Lovely.'_

The inside wasn't any better. Graffiti still covered every possible surface, and Sasori feared the building would collapse at any second. The pews that weren't broken had been pushed aside, leaving room for the rubble Sasori assumed fell from the ceiling. _'I didn't think it was possible, but I found some place worse than my apartment.' _

A total of four people sat on the pews, a pair sat closer to the door, but Sasori only had eyes for the phone stealing bastard. "Yahiko!" They shouted, gathering everyone's attention.

He grinned, though it seemed more like a satisfied smirk. "Hey! I'd knew you'd come!" He stood up with his arm out, asking for high-five that hasn't going to happen. "Welcome to-"

"Give me my phone." They interrupted, not in the mood for games.

"You took the kid's phone?" The person sitting next to Yahiko asked, sounding half shocked. Sasori noticed pretty blue hair, orange eyes, and tanned skin that was almost the same shade as Yahiko's.

Sasori didn't let him answer. "He did, and I want it back." They could feel the other two watching them.

Yahiko pulled out their phone. "You mean this one?"

"Yes."

"This is my phone."

"No, it's _mine._ I bought it."

"That's too bad, cause I found it. And there's the whole 'finders keepers, losers weepers' thing. Since I found it that means this is my phone. Well, actually it's more like the entire Akatsuki's phone. You know, communal property and all. I can prove it, see?" He held it up so the back was showing. Sasori felt annoyance morph into anger.

"_You_ _wrote on my phone?"_

"No, I wrote on _my_ phone. Haven't we been over this already?" Behind them, they could hear snickering. Sasori felt the familiar itch to grab their gun and be done with the whole thing in one easy step. They took a deep breath to calm down.

"Give. It. Back."

"I would, buuuut," Yahiko smirked, beyond pleased with himself. "I can only give it to members of the Akatsuki, since they own it and all. It wouldn't be fair if I let any bum off the street use it."

"I'm not going to join your _stupid_ club-"

"It's not stupid!"

Sasori spoke over him. "-just so I can get what's rightfully _mine_."

The bastard shrugged. "Sucks for you. I would've given it back to you of didn't call the Akatsuki stupid." He sat down. "Anyway, Konan, I got some info on Hanzō-"

Sasori rushed at Yahiko, finger shoved into his chest. A gun cocked in the background, but Sasori wasn't about to be distracted. "I'm not fucking around here. Give me my damn phone already."

The Akatsuki leader lost his smile but not his confidence. "How many people do you see here? Like, in room." Sasori hesitated, letting their finger drop. They took a quick glance before saying there was five, including themself. "That's how many members we have right now. Five whole members. Pathetic, right?"

"Yeah, but why would I care?"

"Because you can help make it a little less pathetic. Six members are better than five."

"You're out of your mind." Sasori stepped back and folded their arms.

Yahiko sighed, running out of tricks. Whatever he was about to say would be a last-ditch, impossible promise like 'I'll let you own half the city!' or 'I'll make you rich!' or-

"What if I told you I'll get your art career off the ground?"

-that.

"Don't listen to him, yeah. That's what he told me a year ago and look at where I am." One of the people behind them said.

"Deidara, we're still working on yours, shut up."

The person next to Yahiko spoke up. "Seriously, Yahiko. How do you plan to deliver on that?"

"Simple, Konan!" With his smirk back, Yahiko jumped up. Sasori stepped aside to avoid a collision. "When we run the city, we'll take over the art district. It can't be that difficult, they're all just a bunch of stoners anyway. Then we can make a few calls and _bam_! They'll get their own exhibit."

"No fair! You said no exhibits!" Deidara exclaimed.

"Because you'll bow yours up!"

"That's art, yeah!"

Sasori couldn't stop from butting in. "Blowing up your own exhibit? There's no way you can call that art. What you can call it is a felony and 20 years in prison."

"The hell are you saying?! Explosions are the very definition of art!"

"You two can have this argument later." Deidara complied but gave Sasori a nasty glare. "First, we need your answer. You in or out?" Yahiko pointed at them.

All eyes were on them, making Sasori feel unnerved. They were in no means a shy person, but having a group of murderers stare at them was enough to leave anyone on edge. Hesitantly they asked, "What stops me from not coming back after I get my phone?"

"Nothing really."

"They why are you sure I will?" Then Yahiko said a simple sentence that shocked Sasori.

"I trust you."

It took Sasori a moment to process that. _'Did he really just say that? Does he really mean that? Trust? He trusts me? How? How can he trust me, he just met me!' _It didn't make any sense! Yahiko knew absolutely nothing about them! They hadn't even known each other a full 24 hours. Sasori hadn't even done anything for him, unless they can count making him save their life. _'What the hell? Is he joking? He has to be. There's no possible way.' _They stared into his eyes to for any sign that he was bullshitting them. But they couldn't find even the barest of traces.

After a few seconds, they took a deep breath. With the fleeting thought of, _'I've got nothing to lose.', _Sasori resigned, "Fine. I'll join your stupid club."

The group cheered. Yahiko clapped their back. Konan stood up to shake their hand. A member with a gun out tried to fist bump them with the gun still in hand. Deidara still looked pissed over the art comment but nodded their way none the less.

"We're gonna canonizing 'em, right?" The member with a gun asked. _'I forgot about canonization. Damn it.' _

"Yeah! We all had to do it!" Deidara looked ecstatic.

"Yes, but we had more members then." Yahiko said.

"C'mon! That's bullshit!"

"Hidan-"

"You can't just hand out colors like they're fucking candy! They gotta be earned!"

Yahiko sighed and nodded solemnly. "You're right. Good luck."

Though they'd never admit it, Sasori didn't notice the fist flying at them until it connected with their face. Their reaction was instant, jumping back. They held their stinging cheek. Hidan swung again, gun still in hand, but they were prepared. In the same motion, Sasori grabbed and jerked him into their knee. Hidan laughed and used the momentum to tackle Sasori to the ground.

The fighting went on for a while, with Deidara and Hidan getting a few good hits in. Konan and Yahiko never joined in, which was good since Sasori had their hands full with the other two. Yahiko ended it with, "Alright, alright! Knock it off! At this rate someone's either going to break a bone or get killed." When Hidan didn't stop punching, Yahiko had to physically pull him of them. Sasori stumbled upright, rubbing a bruise that was already swelling into a black eye.

'_They broke my nose, too. Great. I did terrible.' _Sasori thought as Yahiko helped them onto their feet.

"You did fantastic! A hell of a lot better than these knuckleheads. Deidara fractured like four ribs and Hidan-"

"Watch it." Hidan threatened, nursing his bleeding hand.

"Hidan was knocked out for the rest of the day, scared us cause we were convinced he was in a coma."

"Cause normally we go until you hear a bone break or someone's knocked out." Hidan's bitterness was thinly veiled.

"We're gonna have to make an exception this time. And before you throw a fit, we can finish it later when we have more than a handful of members."

Hidan didn't look happy but didn't argue further. _'These people really respect Yahiko.' _Sasori tried to wipe the drying blood from under their nose. _'I wonder if he's done something to earn it or he's just a shepherd leading sheep.'_

"No one go anywhere, I'm gonna grab Nagato." Yahiko exited through a side door, leaving Sasori to get acquainted with their new gang. Deidara whispered something to Hidan, causing them both to laugh. _'Great, they're best friends and won't want anything to do with me. It's not like a care. I didn't come here to make friends.'_

Konan stood beside them; a tentative hand patted their shoulder. "Welcome to the Akatsuki. If you didn't catch it earlier, my name is Konan, she/her."

"Nice to meet you." She seemed friendly enough, with a non-threating posture and a look in her eyes that said, "Don't fuck with me." She waited for them to continue. "Them/their." Sasori wasn't sure if they wanted to give out their name yet.

"Hidan's sibling uses those pronouns."

Hidan perked up, which looked freaky with the bruises on his face. "I heard my name and sibling. You talking about Jashin? Like how they're number four on the world charts?" Konan sighed like an exasperated mother.

Deidara whined. "Just because we've got a newbie doesn't mean you get to repeat your whole Jashin spiel, yeah."

"Wait, he's related to Jashin? Like the one on the radio?" Sasori nursed their dully throbbing knuckles.

"You bet your candy ass! They're-"Deidara groaned over his words and didn't stop as Hidan continued on.

Yahiko walked in with who Sasori assumed was Nagato, neither of whom looked surprised at the scene. _ 'I guess this happens a lot.' _Nagato pointed at them, asking who they were. Yahiko said to just wait because he was about to explain it all.

"Children, stop it. It's my turn to speak." Yahiko hopped onto what was left of the church's stage. "First off, let me introduce our newest member. They're going to enter as a Lieutenant-"A few protests raised. "Hidan, I know you don't care, shut up. I'm going to personally see to vetting them so there's no need to worry about skill level or anything. Though, I doubt that'll be a problem." Yahiko flashed a smile at them. "You've got the floor. But remember, I'll know if you give us a fake name, _'Hiruko'._"

They had to stop themselves from rolling their eyes. "Fine. My name's Sasori, happy?"

"Very." Yahiko paused incase Sasori was going to say more. When they didn't, "Thank you. Now back to business. We're a small gang. That's obvious, but I have confidence that we, together, can fix that. We can take back the Row and maybe even take the city. But we need to get rid of the other gangs before we can even think about that. The Samurai, the Explosion Corps, and the Salamanders have all been making a mess of our Row for too long. It's time they go down." Sasori side glanced at the other members and saw how they all seemed to hang on Yahiko's every word. "I want this down quick, so I'm splitting up responsibilities. Hidan, I know you'll want the Samurai."

"Damn straight."

"Deidara, you know more about the Explosion Corps than any of us."

"Got it, yeah."

"I've got beef with Hanzō, so I've got the Salamanders. Konan and Nagato, I want you working with me, but I'm sure the others will need your help as well."

"Sure thing."

"And Sasori." Yahiko looked at them, a playful gleam in his eyes. "You're coming with me. After you get cleaned up, of course."

"Alright."

"Great!" He clapped. "Last thing before I let you all go, I want to see uniforms. I know you have them, so if you 'lost it' I'm kicking your ass. Any questions? No? Then let's go!" Yahiko hopped off the stage. Everyone seemed excited by their new tasks.

'_What did I get myself into?'_


End file.
